maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
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