And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize