And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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