I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
