i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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