Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
