do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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