Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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