It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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