Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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