Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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