I molested 6 butterflies tonight
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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