i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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