mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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