Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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