Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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