Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
You left your phone here
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