i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize