I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
love makes seman taste better
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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