And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
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Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
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Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break