So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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