Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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