it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Randomize
