you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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