so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
