so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
