I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
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