i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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