Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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