thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
