Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I need to align my fucking chakras
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