If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
