I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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