Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
