the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
