I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
