my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize