yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize