You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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