pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize
