Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize