I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize
