bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
