I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize