apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
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