Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
