So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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