i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
