My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize