Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
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The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
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I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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