I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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